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 Neil Hamburger's Profile |
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Neil Hamburger, America's $1 Funnyman |
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| Age: | 53 years old |
| Sex: | Male |
| Location: | cardboard box, New Mexico |
| Country: |  United States |
| Height: | 6' 0" |
| Zodiac: |  Cancer (Jun 21 - Jul 22) |
| Last Login: | Jul 7, 2008 (92 days back) |
About Me |
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| Neil Hamburger confirmed tour dates (updated constantly): Sat July 26 - SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The Fillmore (with FLIPPER, NEGATIVE TREND, AVENGERS, MUTANTS) Sun July 27 - LOS ANGELES, CA - Spaceland Thu July 31 - NEW YORK, NY - Knitting Factory Fri Aug 1 - BALTIMORE, MD - Ottobar Sat Aug 2 - CHAPEL HILL, NC - Local 506 Sun Aug 3 - CHARLOTTE, NC - The Milestone Mon Aug 4 - COLUMBIA, SC - The Whig Wed Aug 6 - WASHINGTON, DC - Black Cat Thu Aug 7 - PHILADELPHIA, PA - Johnny Brenda's Fri Aug 8 - NEW HAVEN, CT - Cafe Nine Sat Aug 9 - NORTHAMPTON, MA - Iron Horse Sun Aug 10 - PROVIDENCE, RI - The Living Room Wed Sep 10 - MADISON, WI - High Noon Saloon Sat Sep 13 - OMAHA, NE - The Waiting Room Wed Sep 17 - MINNEAPOLIS, MN - Triple Rock Social Club Thu Sep 18 - DEKALB, IL - House Cafe Fri Sep 19 - CHICAGO, IL - Schuba's Dec 5-7 - MINEHEAD, UNITED KINGDOM - All Tomorrow's Parties Festival These evenings of GREAT ENTERTAINMENT will be the shows that the world never stops talking about! And here is some FREE entertainment for you freeloaders who seem to frequent the internet. I hope that you will open your purses and spend some money on me at some point in the future: Here is Bonnie Prince Billy on "Poolside Chats with Neil Hamburger": - I am the real Neil Hamburger, America's $1 Funnyman. There have been imposters on this internet pretending to be me, but rest assured, it could not have been me, because I do not have a computer and do not conduct correspondence that way. I am setting up this account to provide a format for people to complain about me, and I will try to check in from time to time, whenever there is a coin-operated computer at the truck stops I visit for re-fueling while on the road (a record 420 shows last year!!!) For more information, visit my fan-maintained website at www.americasfunnyman.com The cheapskate crowd may want to click on this text to see episodes of my live-to-internet TV show Poolside Chats With Neil Hamburger. We also have here for you, an episode of Tom Green Live, featuring myself as Tom's side-kick, with Thora Birch. Click here to watch Neil Hamburger, Thora Birch, and Tom Green...together at last! Be sure and visit this important new website: http://www.ihatethatsweedishfuckingpieceofshitsmusic.com Special thanks to my kind-hearted fan Rance Reyes, for helping me with this page when I am unable to afford to use the coin-operated computers to fix all its problems. |
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My Interests |
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| Store brands. | |
I'd like to meet:Someone who could help |
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Music:"Neil Hamburger Sings Country Winners" new CD and LP out now from Drag City Records. |
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Movies:"Left For Dead In Malaysia" "That's Not Gold, That's Dung!" "Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny" "Neil Hamburger Live at Phoenix Greyhound Park" "Neil Hamburger In Australia" |
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Television:DO NOT MISS this recent episode of "Tim and Eric Nite Live" featuring Neil Hamburger ...click to viewAnd here's an old episode of "Poolside Chats" for you as well with special guest Kyle Gass... Also here is an excerpt from a recent episode of Fox News' "Red Eye": |
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Books:Anything placed by the Gideons, except "The Bible" |
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Heroes:Frank Sinatra, Jr. |
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My Background and Lifestyle |
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| MaritalStatus: | Single |
| Ethnicity: | White / Caucasian |
| Children: | I don't want kids |
| Occupation: | America's Funnyman |
My Pictures |
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My Blog |
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Neil Hamburger on Fox News tonight |
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| Friends,If you are a depressed insomniac shut-in, like most of my fans, your Friday night is about to get better! I will be appearing on late night news program "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" on the drea... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Fri, 20 Jun 2008 09:59:00 PST |
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Country Winners Shows this weekend |
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| Dear Friends,AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, I have recently attempted to salvage my career the old-fashioned way...by recording an album of song, despite my lack of qualifications to do so. But the album turned... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Thu, 29 May 2008 09:40:00 PST |
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Joke-writing contest winners! |
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| Ladies and Gentlemen, After sorting through LITERALLY THOUSANDS of submitted jokes, many of them quite poor, we have selected our winners, of the first annual Write A Joke For Neil Hamburger Contes... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Thu, 28 Feb 2008 12:05:00 PST |
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Free preview of new album |
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| Hello again Friends,On April 21st, Drag City records will release my new album, "Neil Hamburger Sings Country Winners".In the tradition of Leonard Nimoy, William Shatn... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:34:00 PST |
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Joke writing competition |
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| Friends,The 1st Annual Neil Hamburger Joke Writing Competition will take place this month in Dubai. (You need not be in Dubai to win.) SUBMIT YOUR ORIGINAL JOKES TO NEIL HAMBURGER for the chance to wi... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Tue, 05 Feb 2008 01:06:00 PST |
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Excluded from the holidays |
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| The clerks at the truck stops have been unusually uninterested in saying "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays" to me this year. Meanwhile, Drag City informs me that no presents or cards have arrived f... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Thu, 20 Dec 2007 12:32:00 PST |
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Help Wanted |
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| Does anyone out there have any expertise putting back together a car that has fallen apart? I'm looking for someone to fix that, and also someone to repair moth-holes in a tuxedo. And finally, I need ... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Tue, 19 Jun 2007 02:59:00 PST |
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Haiku |
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| A failed careerThe laughter dried no one's tearsFate has kept me poor-Neil Hamburger Posted by Neil Hamburger on Mon, 18 Jun 2007 12:47:00 PST |
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Simply awful |
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| Folks, If you are finding this summer to be very, very painful, perhaps I can help. I will be bringing my jokes to selected towns in the American South next week, on a gala tour that pairs me up with ... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 05:38:00 PST |
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Fox News, tonight, May 30 |
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| For those of you who are tired of staring at a blank wall:Improbably, I will be back on the Fox News network tonight, appearing on the popular "Red Eye" TV program, which airs at 2 am Eastern/11 pm Pa... Posted by Neil Hamburger on Wed, 30 May 2007 12:56:00 PST |
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My Friends |
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Simone, Drag City, Dave Gleason, Prairie Prince, TIM AND ERIC AWESOME SHOW GREAT JOB!, mike h, Tom Green, Rachel Haden, The Tubes: White Punks on Dope Documentary, DR EL SUAVO, Stephanie, Saddle Sore Saloon, Norco, CA, Frank Sinatra Jr., PLEASEEASAUR, Agatha, Tanya, ryan, JAMES GOODE, The Abe Lincoln Story, Zip Code Rapists, Josh Haden, Pop-O-Pies, Clinton "Bar" McKinnon, Totally Darryl, Petra Haden, CANNED HAMM, Doug Stanhope, Faxed Head, TH3, the fucking champs, Jesse, schallwedance, adorable little mel, Thomas, paul, Thomas, mickey e. e., Mule, Andy, horatio, Furia de Buzo Ciego, evan bourne, Manic Productions, FLEXXEHAWK, Low Woods, Flipper, angela, Mince Meat Pupils, xvinnyx, B.E.A.T.L.O.A.F., chika, GURU MOMMY TIME, Justin, Chris Strawn, Das Büt Spoken Word, Joel, less stitches, Ryan, Angry Randy, Nervous Energy, Rebecca, 1906Earthquake, Faces McGee, Imaginary Friend, DANGER POPE, *SEGA*, FAT HIPPIE, Laviecestchouette, Trash Video, Joe, Pocket Full Of Brandie, osmorphyus, Tory
Neil Hamburger has 8,824 friends (73 shown). Click here to add Neil Hamburger as a friend. |
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Tags |
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Neil Hamburger's profile has been tagged with the following keywords. Click a tag to search for profiles with the same tags. high noon saloon, johnny brendas, all tomorrows parties, neil hamburger, new haven ct, bonnie prince billy, knitting factory, triple rock social club, chapel hill nc, cardboard box, local 506, ottobar, providence ri, schubas, funnyman, negative trend, coin operated computer, spaceland, minneapolis mn |
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