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 Meyli's Profile |
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... just the girl all the boys want a chance with... |
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| Age: | 23 years old |
| Sex: | Female |
| Location: | Baltimore, Maryland |
| Country: |  United States |
| Height: | 5' 2" |
| BodyType: | More to love! |
| Zodiac: |  Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18) |
| Last Login: | Jun 24, 2008 (515 days back) |
| I am Here For Friends. | |
About Me |
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| Comments are now approval-only, meaning you can write me messages through my comments, and yes... I read them all. :) I Talk: in a secret language only a select few native Uranians would be able to comprehend. I Smell : god awful. Something like a mixture between burning tires and elephant droppings. I Hide : from my imaginary friends. I Pray: to the people who created Adderall. I Walk : No, I don't. I'm too lazy to walk anywhere. I drive down to the end of the driveway to get the mail everyday. I Can : lick my own anus. I Daydream : about Paddington one day coming to life. I Sometimes : don't wash my hands before preparing a tasty dish for my loved ones. I Bathe : once every leap year. I Stop : traffic when I go out. Probably because it's my day job to direct traffic at stoplights that aren't functioning properly. I'm serious. I am in : my own little world - all the damn time. I Play : your mom like a piano. I Miss : when you were little and never felt like crap. I Hold : grudges like it's nobody's business. I Forgive : not easily. I Drive : people insane. I Learn : nothing from my mistakes. I Have : a rather intense combination of leg herpes and anal warts this month. I Don't : joke around. I Made : love to your mom. I Kiss : like we're in a movie. I Believe : that everything happens for a reason. I Wait : impatiently because waiting for anything sucks. I Need: a mean cup of Chef Boyardee. I Feel : all up on little kids. I Know : a lot more than people give me credit for. I Wonder : how we came to exist. I am: Meyli. The Story of MEYLIThe Myth, The Legend, The Butthole.Meyli was born on a small farm in Kansas as the youngest of five children. Her siblings Emily, Limey, Miley, and Jim Bob never failed to ostracize and tease her about her real father being the milkman, but she refused to be swayed by their lies. At a tender young age, Meyli was given simple tasks around the farm which included, but were not limited to, feeding the schizophrenic horse, Barry. Barry had an episode one morning and managed to kick little Meyli in the leg as she was emptying his feeding trough. The bruises became so severely infected that her leg had to be amputated, and this traumatic experience would later propel her ceaseless fear of horses and schizophrenics. Meyli decided then and there that she would not allow the fact that she now had a prosthetic leg to hinder her from chasing her dreams of one day becoming a middle-school bus driver. She would now work twice as hard as the average retard, and graduate high school in the nineteenth percentile in her class. After high school, Meyli decided that Kansas was too small a state for her, and she decided to move to Delaware - the land of a million opportunities. After a two-year stint at the local Burger King (she was promoted to night manager after only 23 months!), she realized she had lost touch of her roots, and decided to go get them touched up at a rather upscale hair salon called Hair Cuttery on the corner of 7th and Center Street. The man cutting her hair was so taken with Meyli, that he immediately began filling her head with thoughts of modeling and all things grandeur. Gustavo told her that he had connections and with a little work, he would be able to turn her into a model for the town's dollar store - and later on, the Special Olympics. Meyli became so excited that she quit her job at Burger King (and she now regrets this decision because it was biggest mistake of her life) and began training rigorously by doing five jumping jacks a week so that she could one day be a model. In the midst of things, Meyli fell madly in love with Gustavo, and they got married, and even bought a little apartment together. The wedding was small, but everything she had ever imagined her first wedding to be. They held it in the gymnasium of the town high school, and it was absolutely glorious. Only two of her siblings were able to make it, but they were the two that Meyli didn't completely despise, so it was alright. The reception was held at McDonald's, as all twelve of the guests enjoyed the various dollar menu items - on the house! Two months later, Meyli's mother came to visit - only to realize that Gustavo was Meyli's actual biological father. The moment was a tad awkward, as you can imagine. The marriage came to an abrupt end, and Meyli had to say goodbye - despite the fact that Gustavo would always remain her first true love. As a tribute, she got a tattoo around her anal lining of his name in a heart. And I guess that leads us to where her life is now. Meyli moved to the dirty city of Baltimore, MD where she would attempt to lead a normal life. Modeling followed her, however, and a nice man named Mark Mogadishiu Meyers became determined to make Meyli part of his vision - The NOPI Chic vision. Despite her mental instability and the prosthetic leg, Meyli was everything he was looking for - two eyes, a nose, beauty, brains, ambition, a killer personality, and even a set of ears! She is currently one of the select NOPI Chics on tour, so be sure to catch her at one of the shows. She may even show you her tattoo! BLOG FRENZYClick to read Meyli's New Year's resolutions for 2007! Click to read the guide to dating Meyli! Click to fill out a boyfriend application! Click to find out how to get your very own sign pic from Meyli! Frequently Asked Questions:Q: Can you add me as a friend, please? [insert e-mail address here] Of course I can. But why don't YOU add ME as a friend. It's simple, easy, and takes less time to do that than to write me a message requesting that I add you as a friend. To those of you who give me the BS that it won't let you add me without my e-mail address, it's MissMeyli@Yahoo.Com - and I look forward to accepting your friend request. Anybody can be my friend, so you don't even have to send a message asking if it's alright with me. *thumbs up* Q: Can I have your AIM/Yahoo/MSN screen name? Unfortunately, due the overwhelming amount of MySpacers who flooded my screen while I was trying to work on my site... I no longer give out my AIM screen name. If you'd like to contact me, you're more than welcome to leave me a comment on MySpace. Q: Do you manage your MySpace or do you have someone do it for you? My good buddy Schwartzy was so kind to design the background and contact table for me, but aside from that, yes, I do it all myself. I read each and every comment, picture comment, blog, messages (back before I blocked them due to the chronic masturbation) and have written this entire profile up from the ground with exactly what you all started with as well. I find that it's the least I could do for the fans. And even if I am an asshole to some of the imbeciles on here who lack common sense or the slightest shred of tact, at least it's me being an asshole to them, and not some random person I hired to do my bitch work. Q: How do I get an 8x10 of you since the banner contest is on hold? If you are interested in having an 8x10 of me, please send me an e-mail to MeyliMerch@Yahoo.Com (subject: "8x10") and I will give you more details on which 8x10s you can choose from. They are 11$ and I only accept PayPal. Thanks for all your support! Q: What's your nationality? I'm 3/4 Chinese, and 1/4 Irish. This does not mean I have four parents. Q: Are you into "hot chat"? Personally, I think anybody who gets their jollies off to pixels on a computer screen is a tad pathetic. But hey, that might just be me. Q: Do you have a boyfriend? Yes, as of January 28th, 2007 - I do. His name is Dare Bear. He is a 26 year old accountant, and I adore him. :) Q: Do you want to meet up and chill? Generally, I am not a fan of meeting people from the internet (god forbid), though I have on many different occasions with mixed results. I feel that if you came across as somebody really cool to me, then yes, I wouldn't have a problem chilling with you... in real life. How do you achieve this? Here are some simple steps. 1. Don't come across as a horny pervert. 2. Try to be original. 3. Have monster testicles. See? Not too hard to follow. Cool people usually take a month to really become spiffy and awesome, so if you can handle that... who knows! Q: Hi, I met you at a club, why wouldn't you dance with me? Rather than use lame excuses such as "oh, umm... my boyfriend works at the bar", I may sometimes tell people that I simply don't dance with anyone... and that's the honest truth. Dancing is my passion - I'm in my own little world when I dance. I honestly have more fun dancing by myself, than having the hottest guy in the world freak all up on me. To this, many have said, "well, why don't you just stay in your room and dance the night away there?". Because the energy from all the people in the club gives me momentum, and I have a fabulous time if that energy is amazing. :) Q: What the hell happened to MISSMEYLI.COM? I forgot to pay the host for another year with the domain, and some asshole decided to buy the domain name while refusing to sell it back to me unless I give him 1,000. And I am not sure I can get my lazy ass up off of my semi-comfortable computer chair to do something about it, sooooo... I guess you will have to wait even longer for my site to be complete (and it has been under construction for... FOREVER). But seriously, why would I need a site when I have so much fun on MySpace? :) Q: Can I have a webcam sign picture from you? I am currently not making webcam sign pictures for anyone. Q: Can you go on cam for me? No. Meyli's Internet FeaturesJackpot for the StalkersJanuary 2007 - All Out Party Feature (interview w/ pics) October 2006 - Smiles That Kill Feature (interview w/ pics) March 2006 - Below the Belt Show's Honey of the Month Feature (interview w/ pics) November 2004 - Car & Model Feature (interview w/ pics) December 2003 - Drop Jaw Mag's Homegrown Cutie (old ass pics) Everybody thought I was a bitch on Friendster because I only added the people that I knew in real life, which is why I only had like 40 friends. I mean, it sounds like a lot. But compared to everyone else who has thousands, I must have come off as stuck up. So I will add everybody who expresses interest. AND WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE IT IF THOSE I EXPRESS INTEREST IN ADD ME BACK. This is MySpace: a place for friends and networking. Not MySelfishSpace: Don't Talk to Me If I Don't Know You Because I Have A Hammer Up My Ass. Many people on MySpace are under the impression that I'm some sort of diva living a ridiculously luxurious life. Realistically, I'm just a normal little girl, trying to make it big in something I'm passionate about. I think every one of us is aspiring to something bigger, and perhaps that's what unites us in this jolly .. community. For those of you who think nothing of MySpace... I don't think there previously existed anything that brought this many people together, all in a nice friendly community. Or anything remotely close. I think we owe Tom some homage. He is a fantastic guy. If you ever need anything, Tom, please don't hesitate to ask. TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey Name: Meyli Birthday: January 30th, 1985 Birthplace: In a tent on Uranus. Current Location: Baltimore, MD. Eye Color: Whatever color contacts I put in. Hair Color: Brown/Black for now. Height: 5'2". Right Handed or Left Handed: Right, though I like to tell people I am both so it appears I might be good at something. Your Heritage: 3/4 Chinese, 1/4 Irish. The Shoes You Wore Today: Blue and white Skechers. Your Weakness: The internet. Your Fears: Losing my internet connection. Your Perfect Pizza: Thin crust with beef + pineapple! Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To be able to lick my butthole. Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: LOL. Thoughts First Waking Up: Did I feed the fish already? Your Best Physical Feature: My legs. Your Bedtime: Preferably 10PM, but usually around 1. Your Most Missed Memory: MOONBOUNCE. Pepsi or Coke: Coke. MacDonalds or Burger King: Burger King. Single or Group Dates: Group dates! (this is a question that doesn't really apply to me, since I lack friends). Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate. Like poop. Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino. Do you Smoke: Hell no. I'm allergic to it. Do you Swear: Do I ever! Do you Sing: Only along with the voices in my head. Do you Shower Daily: If by daily, you mean once a week, then yes. Have you Been in Love: Yes, sir. Do you want to go to College: I'm in college, dumbass. Do you want to get Married: Perhaps. Do you belive in yourself: Not really. Do you get Motion Sickness: Do you want to find out? Do you think you are Attractive: Not especially. I actually have low self-esteem, believe it or not. Are you a Health Freak: Ummm... does greasy fast food constitute "health"? Do you get along with your Parents: Now, I do! Do you like Thunderstorms: If I'm indoors, yes. Do you play an Instrument: Piano, violin, guitar, bass, and I'm a beast on the triangle. In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Since I turned 21 about 13 days ago, I've drank 11 days out of the 13. In the past month have you Smoked: Ewww. NO. In the past month have you been on Drugs: Does my prescribed Adderall count? In the past month have you gone on a Date: With my left hand. In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Arundel Mills, baby! In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Do I look fat to you or something? In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No, but I'd like to. In the past month have you been on Stage: Does on top of a trailer count... thus causing the fire marshall and local authorities to come screaming bloody murder? In the past month have you been Dumped: Yes, someone took a dump on my chest. In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: In my weekly shower! In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Uhhh... I'd like to answer this, but they might not let me back there if they knew. Ever been Drunk: What is alcohol? Ever been called a Tease: That's my middle name! Ever been Beaten up: Only for my lunch money today. Ever Shoplifted: Tic Tacs when I was 4. And then they put my picture in the window. I still can't go back to this day. How do you want to Die: Peacefully. In fire. What do you want to be when you Grow Up: White! What country would you most like to Visit: Canada. In a Boy/Girl.. Favourite Eye Color: Blue/Green. Favourite Hair Color: Brown. Short or Long Hair: Short (spikes!!). Height: 6'0"+. This is a MUST. Weight: 190+-. Best Clothing Style: Preppy. Number of Drugs I have taken: I guess this is where the survey maker went retarded. If I had a dollar for every pill of Adderall I've popped... yeaaaah. Number of CDs I own: Do burned ones count? Mwahaha. I mean... nothing... hi RIAA... ;-) Number of Piercings: 2. Number of Tattoos: 0. Number of things in my Past I Regret: Live your life with no regrets! :) CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS! |
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My Interests |
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NEW FOR SALE:
Super Awesome Meyli Posters!
Personally autographedwith any message you want, a great decoration for any room! SIZE: 18"x24"... huuuge! PRICE: $25.00 via PayPal (shipping included), or $20 in person at NOPI shows! FEATURES: This poster has been clinically proven to enlarge penis size without the use of any creams or pills. Ground-breaking, indeed! If you would like to discuss other forms of payment, please contact meylimerch@yahoo.com - I also accept payment in the forms of hot boiled peanuts (shelled) and/or White Cheddar Cheez-It's. This is the new bar in downtown Baltimore that I am bartending at which is friggin' AWESOME!!! I work on most Wednesday's, Thursday's, Friday's, and Saturday's, and you'd be a complete square not to come out and check it out. =)It's a classy nightclub that only plays rock music. Click the picture to go to its MySpace!Try JibJab Sendables ! Melly Telly!My NOPI TunerVision Feature when I won the NOPI MD-2 bikini contest! Here are some highlights from my NOPI Tunervision feature of when I was NOPI Chic of the Week (NOPI MI 2007). Some things I'd like to throw out there before you view this next one: 1) I am aware I look like a beached whale during my interview. I did not know the camera was able to throw a whole thirty pounds on me. 2) That is not MY car that I am washing. Thus the stock rims and lack of any other modifications. 3) I was super nervous, and am completely aware of how stupid I sound. 4) I am not reading my modifications off of cue cards. I am looking down at the ground camera... yes, the same one responsible for making me look like a lard ass. Okay, now go watch! =) 2007 NOPI MD-2 Bikini Contest, I Won 1st Place!! 2006 NOPI MD-2 Bikini Contest, I placed 5th! Cars, Modeling, Cars, Teddy Bears, Cars, Music, Cars, Bikes, Cars, Racing (street, drag, and my fave: highway rampages), Mercedes - Benz, BMW M3, Corvette (C5 - LS1 or Z06), E46 BUMMER!!, Rx7, MKIV Supra, Mini Cooper, Trans Am Ws6, Sportbikes (YAMAHA R1 *drool*), Porn, UMBC, Playing Yahoo Games, Knitting, Billiards, Bowling .. Random Pics of the MomentProof that I have no life! NOPI = LOVE Mr. Greengenes + Miller Lite? Couldn't be happier! I may suck ass at guitar, but I rocked at bass guitar for six years. Bet ya didn't know that! It was a pretty spiffy Halloween 2006. |
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I'd like to meet:A one-legged unicyclist. The Spiffiest People I Know I have imaginary friends. Dare Bear Bleebsicle Shananana Paddington Dangy Caitlin Mina-licious Psycho Kara My Nat Manda Burr Shoe Shine Risa Angerine C-c-c-claudia Cat Jessica Gibson Mogadishiu Meyers NOPI CHIC Angels Rock Bar Hooter Ray Dawnnie Jenny Lynn Gina Love Boyer BackFat Bobby Daddy Bethel Brenty Poo Douggie Fresh Dan Germy Doooostin Super Nikky Errrrrica Tessea Big Boobs Sarah Sammy Full Focus Modeling View All of My Friends |
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Music:I'm one of those people who says they listen to everything, and I really do. Techno/trance, rock/punk/emo, pop, rap/r&b, oldies, eighties music, even country! There's a lot more that I'll add when I get the chance. Rock/Alternative: Pop/Rap/R&B: Techno: Comedians: |
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Movies:I love funny movies. Funny to the point of stupidity. Needless to say, I'm easily amused.I also love movies that make me think. |
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Books:ME? Read?!?!?! Haha, j/k. It's hard for me to read a book due to my huge attention deficit and lack of an attention span, but one book I was glued to was "His Bright Light" by Danielle Steele which is a biography about her deceased son Nick Traina who was an inspiration to many. It's a very touching story. |
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Heroes:The guy who invented the drinking straw. GENIUS! |
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My Background and Lifestyle |
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| MaritalStatus: | In a Relationship |
| Ethnicity: | Black / African descent |
| SexualOrientation: | Not Sure |
| Hometown: | Washington, DC |
| Religion: | Mormon |
| Smoker: | No |
| Drinker: | Yes |
| Children: | Proud parent |
| Education: | College graduate |
| Occupation: | Drug Dealer |
| Income: | $150,000 to $250,000 |
My Pictures |
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My Blog |
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Meyli Update- April 10, 2008 |
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| Haha, I know many of you are probably sick to your stomachs of my promotional bulletins, but I’d like you all to know that I do not post them with the primary goal of annoying you to your wit&rs... Posted by Meyli on Thu, 10 Apr 2008 01:31:00 PST |
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My MySpace Friends Are Frickin Morons. |
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| I had been waiting quite some time to call attention to this matter, but I feel now is the time to slap you all over your heads and kick you in the nuts.For those of y... Posted by Meyli on Wed, 27 Feb 2008 10:14:00 PST |
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Meyli Update - November 2007 |
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| Greetings to all my wonderful MySpace friends. I know I have been somewhat neglecting you guys, but you must understand how incredibly busy I've been with my new job at Angels Rock Bar, and bein... Posted by Meyli on Tue, 13 Nov 2007 09:13:00 PST |
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I have a new pet peeve. |
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| Why do guys take things of mine (Paddington, my backpack, my beer bottle opener, etc.) just so I'll be like "give it back, please give it back, pleeeeeease". Is it some way of flirting? Qu... Posted by Meyli on Sat, 22 Sep 2007 03:21:00 PST |
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The Butthole Blogs - Meyli's 2007 Tour |
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| I've always wanted to do something like this, but never got the chance (that, and I'm simply incredibly lazy). So here's the deal. I'm going to be posting images, stories, and other random... Posted by Meyli on Tue, 13 Mar 2007 10:28:00 PST |
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Attention MySpace Friends |
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| Well, it's July 9th and I'm STILL approving all the comments and reading all the messages spanning back from June 25th. Somewhere in there, were many responses to my bulletins some of whic... Posted by Meyli on Mon, 09 Jul 2007 11:29:00 PST |
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Meyli's Nasty Little Thoughts - Every New Beginning Comes From Some Other Beginning's End |
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| 1/1/2007This has absolutely nothing to do with my New Year's Eve resolutions, but what the hell is with all the penis pictures sending me friend requests?! I don't mind being your friend, but se... Posted by Meyli on Sun, 31 Dec 2006 11:10:00 PST |
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I have the best MySpace friends and fans. |
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| UPDATE: I have been slacking on making signs for you guys. If you made one for me but have NOT yet received one back, please e-mail me at mey1@umbc.edu with the subject title.. uhh.. (GORI... Posted by Meyli on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 12:58:00 PST |
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Dating Meyli... For Dummies |
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| Cover artwork by Jung... Posted by Meyli on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 08:43:00 PST |
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Meyli's Freestyle Rap Battle Skills - Check It Out! |
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| So I decided to take a break from all the serious and/or sad blogs to give you (my MySpace buddies) a little taste of my goofy funny side. My buddy Julian and I got bored tonight and decided to have ... Posted by Meyli on Wed, 25 Oct 2006 12:35:00 PST |
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My Friends |
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Darren, Sha na na na, stevenCbloom, Caitlin, Junkette Kara @Hard Times in Fairfax Tues 6/24!, AMANDA OLSON, ClaudiaG-Will be@THE LOFT in SaTx.Thursday night!!, Lisa Angeline, Caya ur dream girl wont b online till the 20th! :(, Sunshine Rodriguez in DC, Mina, Chloe McCoy, Mark Meyers, VALENE DREAM, TILA TEQUILA, NOPI CHIC in COLUMBUS OHIO - June 7-8, samIam, RYAN, Begay, MAYA SIMONE [is in SoCal til July 2nd], Jessica Renee ♥, PAKARMZ ALBUM OUT NOW, trevor, Tickets On Sale for Kaba Modern July 5th @ Transit, Mike, Beauty by Design Agency, Chamie the 13th (I’m In Jail...Write Me!!!), Hit N Run, Frosty's Finest Myspace girls, YOUNG JAY™ *** Feat. Nycole Valentina ***, jeremiah, schwARTzy™, dont h8, RayRay, RONNY LARSEN - PERSONAL FRIENDS ONLY, PLEASE, MADE NEW PAGE, jochy, dino della porta, <<KiNg JaMeS>>, DJ PUSH PARTY ANIMALZ! @CANAL ROOM EVRY SATURDAYZ!, drewwbabyy, laura daniela, \\/\//17f43d0, MacyFace, Alby, HEATHER RAY = VIP manager @ Angels Rock Bar!!, JoKeR KaAn*NEW DESIGN*, The Visionary, Mexx, PornoBone, R.I.P. GC, Nobody Doe$ it Betta !!!!, ROB, Carbon Access Photography, Mr. Wilkens, ☆★!!╚»tAmΣ 1иΣя™«╝!!☆★P_m SqUad☆, RIP @ WINNER ® SHIT YA DIGG!, Bob's a "BIG Boy", Ka0s_StV, Illfully Real, JAY©™, Mindful Innovations, ROB, DANGE, Oh No iTs Y.O/ R.I.P Tray..Mr Powered by 12volts!, HWG SERDAR ABI, MARYJANE MUSIC, FuCk WhAt It CoSt Im Da BoSs, Paul
Meyli has 283,961 friends (69 shown). Click here to add Meyli as a friend. |
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Meyli's profile has been tagged with the following keywords. Click a tag to search for profiles with the same tags. mormon religion, value honesty, club appearances, giant ball, cant trust, trustworthy person, lonely life, eccentricities, african descent, nopi, baltimore maryland, idiosyncrasies, best friends, enemies, meyli, shannon, integrity, angels, scope, washington dc |
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